(no subject)

A SKINNY LITTLE WHITE GUY

A skinny little white guy goes into an elevator, looks up and sees this HUGE black guy standing next to him. The black guy sees the little guy staring at him looks down and says: "7 ft 2 inches tall, 350 pounds, 20 inch penis, 3 pound left testicle, 3 pound right testicle, Turner Brown."

The white man faints dead away and falls to the floor.

The black guy kneels down and brings him to, shaking him. The big fellow says, "What's wrong with you?"

In a weak voice the little guy says, "What did you say to me again?"
The man says, "I saw the way you were looking at me so I figured I'd just give you the answers to the questions everyone always asks me. I'm 7' 2" tall, I weigh 350 pounds, I have a 20 inch penis, my left testicle weighs 3 pounds, my right testicle weighs 3 pounds and my name is Turner Brown."

The little guy says, "Turner Brown? Oh, thank God! I thought you said, 'turn around'!"

(no subject)

Seems that in the latter part of the cold war Russia was allowed some limited trade with the U.S. Some nameless institution ordered 50,000 condoms from an American plant (located in Texas, I like to think). The order specified that the condoms were to be 11 inches long. The Americans scratched their heads, called the Russians to verify the measurement, and were rudely told that the order was correct, all of the condoms should be 11 inches long.

So the Americans proceeded to fill the order and shipped the Russians 50,000 11-inch condoms-- in boxes labeled "medium."

(no subject)